Sharing My Stuff

I have a confession. Yesterday I cheated.

No! I did not go shopping at Michaels!
No! I did not hide craft supplies in my attic! (Not that the temptation hasn’t reared its ugly head.)

My friend Sherry came by and I loaded her down --- yikes, what an expression! Let’s try that again, I gifted her with envelopes, paper, and other supplies that can be used by the teachers and students at her school. It felt good to let the supplies go, especially knowing that they would be put to a good use. Sherry actually seemed to have more anxiety on my behalf, saying, “Are you sure you’re okay with this? Are you sure I can have this?” I was actually energized by the process. I’m just sorry she didn’t take more!

Side note: Linda and Denise, don’t worry. There is still PLENTY of stuff left.

Sherry called me this morning. She has brought just one box into her house from the back of her car and she is already feeling overwhelmed. She shared with me that it has given her insight into how I must feel, how I’ve been feeling for years faced with my own clutter. She looked at all the stuff in the back of her car and thought, “What the heck do I do with this now?” It was all stuff she wanted; stuff she chose. And it is stuff that she took with a particular use in mind. And yet, she --- a “cleanie”, an accomplished organizer ---is overwhelmed by it.

I’m glad that Sherry called me this morning to tell me about her experience. It helps me to hear her perception and awareness. I guess I’m allowing myself to know that I’m not a bad person because I’m overwhelmed by all this stuff and can’t seem to get it together. It would be normal for anyone to be overwhelmed by this much stuff. I’m not a bad person because I chose this stuff, because I wanted this stuff, or because I collected this stuff. It is normal for people to want and get stuff. Many people have eyes bigger than their closets, rooms, homes, garages, storage units.

I think sometimes when we live with something; for example, a particular belief or behavior; we can become numb to the effects of that belief or behavior. Here is an example: I walk around every day carrying an additional 80 pounds of body fat. This is down from 100 pounds. I was amazed by how much of a difference it made to my ability to move and breathe to release just twenty pounds. I've been heavy for so long that I barely notice hauling an extra 80 pounds around. Yet if you gave me an 80-pound bag of flour to carry around I'd be fully aware of how it physically challenged me. Part of growing willing and ready to let go is being willing to be aware of what it is costing me to hold on.


Similarly, I may not fully realize what keeping all of this stuff is costing me until it is gone. When my space is free of the visual clutter; when my mind is clear of clinging to the past; only when I experience freedom will I be fully aware of my previous bondage. So, it is good when we can see our world through someone else’s eyes. In this case I am motivated by the promise of moving out of the land of overwhelm.


I know the experience of the gradual lightening of my load. I know that the more I release the more deeply motivated I become to gain greater freedom. The more freedom I have the more freedom I want.


I thanked Sherry for calling me and then I said one last thing,

“You can’t bring it back.”